/ / The Man,His Penis And Premature Ejaculation
The Man,His Penis And Premature Ejaculation

The Man,His Penis And Premature Ejaculation

with No Comments

I receive messages from men, young and old, troubled by this issue of premature ejaculation all seeking solutions to help put an end to it, sometimes I receive messages from wives who have been left unsatisfied and frustrated by their husband’s ” one minute” match in the bedroom ,so I have decided to explore this topic, the causes, temporary and permanent solutions.so let’s start

 

What causes premature ejaculation? Many men suffering from the condition would like to know why they don’t “last” long enough for them (or their partner) to really enjoy sex.

Premature ejaculation happens shortly before or after penetration, although there is no precise “time limit” that defines it. Depending on different places and cultures it mostly means lasting less than two minutes.

 

In order to deal with the problem, it’s crucial to understand the causes of premature ejaculation. These causes can include excessive excitement, fear of performance problems and other forms of anxiety. It can also include physical causes such as acute hypersensitivity of the nervous system.

 

What Causes Premature Ejaculation?

Although there is no universal definition, ejaculation is usually considered to be premature if it occurs within 2 minutes of intercourse or if the man cannot control the ejaculation.

Premature ejaculation may be caused by stress, performance-related anxiety and other relationship issues. It can also be caused by hypersensitivity of the skin of the penis (in which case, numbing creams can help).

 

Who is affected by premature ejaculation?

Although the condi tion is more common in myen under 35, it generally tends to occur in men who are dealing with a new situation, such as a new relationship, a new experience or a stressful situation in the relationship (e.g. tensions or conflicts).

 

A condition in need of further research

Unfortunately, the causes of premature ejaculation are not fully understood. This is partly due to lack of research/data on the condition, but also because of the underlying psychological factors which make it hard to identify a clear cause.

It is difficult to determine what causes premature ejaculation, whether it is caused by psychological factors, hypersensitive nerves in the penis or a combination of both.

In general, it seems that a combination of different techniques and treatments works best for men suffering from premature ejaculation (PE).

 

Lifelong Vs. acquired premature ejaculation

Lifelong premature ejaculation means that the problem has always existed since puberty, whereas acquired premature ejaculation indicates that someone started suffering from PE at some point later in his life.

 

Causes of lifelong premature ejaculation

Psychological issues are more common with men who have lifelong premature ejaculation than those who have acquired premature ejaculation later in life:

Some men may have conditioned themselves to ejaculate quickly in their adolescence (to avoid getting caught)

Some men may have become overly anxious with sex, because of a childhood trauma related to sex

There may be a cultural aspect too, especially if sex is considered inappropriate or shameful

 

Causes of acquired premature ejaculation

This type of premature ejaculation can be caused by both physical and psychological issues.

Stress and depression are common causes of acquired premature ejaculation just like relationship issues, conflicts and performance-related anxiety.

Physical causes of premature ejaculation include: conditions such as diabetes, high blood pressure, thyroid problems and prostate disease as well as binge drinking.

Some serious illnesses, such as multiple sclerosis can cause premature ejaculation, as they can result in nerve damage.

 

Early experiences with masturbation and sex

Many men grew up in homes where sexuality wasn’t discussed. Or worse, perhaps they grew up in homes where sex was viewed as dirty and shameful. They might have even been scared or shamed away from touching themselves as children, and hence when they later hit puberty and had feelings of desire and arousal, they were probably very frightened and confused. They might have experimented with self-stimulation but done so in a rushed, frenetic manner due to fear of being caught or just because they didn’t even want to think about what they were doing.

Years later, it’s easy to see how all of this can play into a man’s sexual response. Even as an adult, he might have a hard time undoing all those years of shame. He learned how to speed up his sexual response as fast as possible in those early years, and that can be hard to undo even decades down the road. Simply communicating these issues to your partner or even talking about them with a therapist can go a long way in undoing those learned habits. The best way to resolve these matters is by discussing them, and most men are relieved to know that is far from an uncommon issue. Sadly, it happens quite a lot, but by being open and honest, men can undo the hold of the past.

 

Physical issues

There is also a physical side to PE. For years, doctors thought that premature ejaculation was all psychological, but now we know differently. There are many physical culprits which can interfere with a man’s sexual response. These include out-of-whack hormones, thyroid conditions, and inflammation or infection of the urethra or prostate. Many doctors believe that there is even a genetic side to premature ejaculation, so it could be something completely related to the genetic environment that men simply inherit. Researchers believe that many men have hypersensitivity of the penis – that the nerves in the penis are particularly sensitive to sexual stimulation. You should talk to your doctor about your sexual symptoms, as well as any other issues you might be experiencing. Discuss any possible factors that might relate, such as a new medication you recently started taking or even a medication you recently stopped taking. Ruling out physical causes and having your hormones and your thyroid tested can be a good first step.

 

Relationship issues

Sex doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Whether your relationship with your partner is off-track or you are experiencing major stress at work or at home, your sexual response can be thrown off-kilter. If your PE is relatively new and seems to have begun around a time of stress or tension in your relationship, this could certainly be the cause for it.

 

You can help your partner with early ejaculation by trying some of these techniques from the erection toolkit.

 

Here are five of the most effective tools from the erection toolkit

Deep Breathing

Deep breathing is a form of meditation that can sometimes help control the arousal and tension that lead to early ejaculation. Try to see if he can avoid shallow, short breathing, which speeds up his heartbeat and can trigger EE. Try to get him to spend five seconds breathing in one deep, full breath, hold it for about three seconds, and then exhale for five seconds. If he can do this for about five minutes without breaking the rhythm, he may be able to use it in the bedroom. Plus, focusing on each other’s breathing, and how it rises and falls, can build an intimate connection.

 

The Stop-and-Start Method

This begins as a solo exercise. Your partner should begin by masturbating alone, bringing himself close to orgasm and stopping. After relaxing, he should continue bringing himself closer and closer to orgasm until he can’t hold it any longer. (Doing this several times by himself without distraction will help him learn where his point of no return is.) When he feels that he has mastered the technique, the two of you should engage in sexual activity that stops short of intercourse.

 

The Squeeze Method

This method requires one of you to squeeze the base of the penis at the same point that the stop-and-start technique would be used, when he is at the brink of orgasm. The idea is to reduce your partner’s erection through squeezing. Just as with the stop-and-start method, your partner should do it on his own first, master it, and then invite you to practice the technique with him.

 

Kegel Exercises

Kegels aren’t just for women. There’s no better method to strengthen the pelvic region than to create a strong pubococcygeus muscle (PC muscle), which can help control ejaculation. The easiest way for him to find this muscle is to see if he can stop the flow of urine when he goes to the bathroom. It’s the PC muscle that he uses to do that. Once he finds it, he needs to practice feeling exactly where it is located and make sure he engages it, rather than using his abdominals, buttocks, or thighs. (These must all stay loose when doing Kegel exercises.) To do Kegels, he will quickly clench and release the PC muscle repeatedly for ten seconds. He should do three sets, with a ten-second break between sets. If he contracts his PC muscle when he’s close to orgasm, he should be able to slow things down.

 

Tantric Techniques

Sex that is truly explorative is more than just traditional physical pleasure. Try using the tantric techniques of establishing an intimate connection, including when he’s nearing the point of no return. When he approaches that point, he should cease stimulation (i.e., pull out), then contract the PC muscle and lower his chin to his chest (this is important, as it prevents energy from rising too high and making him feel ungrounded). He should then draw in a breath, feeling the warmth of sexual energy rise upwards in his body. Repeat this as needed, until the desire to release is no longer urgent.

 

Temporary solutions to premature ejaculation include using delay sprays (they help to reduce the sensations/sensitivity felt during sex, you spray on your penis just before sex)

Other helpful tips include

Exercise( jogging and press up  helps build your sexual stamina)

If you are overweight and you are suffering from premature ejaculation, please try your best to shed the weight off

Drink lots of water,

Avoid sugar, pastries and reduce carbohydrates

Avoid or if possible eliminate alcohol

Reduce stress and rest properly

Avoid lime and lemon totally

Inculcate banana and walnut into your diet

Use Ruzu -a lot of my clients  have testified to its efficacy( you can contact me if you are interested in it)

 

To get our Premature ejaculation and weak erection kit go here

 

Did you enjoy the post? Have you been having issues with premature ejaculation; please share with us in the comment box below. Don’t forget to share this post

 

Follow ourintimatesecrets:

Sex Therapist

Olatoun Ayoola is a Relationship and Marriage Counselor, a Sex Therapist, Family life Coach and Blogger that specializes in providing hope, support and guidance for individuals and couples, both in and out of marriages, relationships and their sex life, and also to help them live a fulfilling and enriching life.